Chapter 12 really sparked so many thoughts in me this week. Often times in education,or at least the trainings I've been to the past few years, we practice "I" messages. Telling our students what "I" need to see happen, or what "I" would like to see happen rather than just telling kids what "they" need to do. "I" messages seem to be all the rage at my school even, and I didn't realize until I read this chapter about the We story. The "I" messages have worked decently, but what a concept to make it about we to show that I am there in support of my students, staff, and other co workers. I even tested it out today on one of my tutors that is a college student, and it worked so wonderfully. He really felt a part of the decision making process, and felt as though "we" (he and I) found a solution to something. I could totally see his confidence shift. It was astounding, truly. I really want to practice this more. I must deprogram my brain from the "I" message and allow the WE to sing out of my mouth!! What a great way to end this amazing piece of literature. This week I will begin my transformation from I to we.....!!!!
We is always more powerful than I... congrats on the discovery.
ReplyDeleteDon't think the "I" syndrome is limited only to education, I see it in business, in my students, as a matter of fact, almost everywhere. For me "I" thoughts all the time lead to selfishness and pointing fingers toward others if something goes wrong. I hope I use "WE" enough but will be more aware of how I approach people from now on. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this chapter. Think one of the main reason groups or companies succeed is that they work together as a team, accept the positive and negative responses to things as a team and never but one person out to accept the acknowledgment or take the blame.
ReplyDeleteHi Kimberly,
ReplyDeleteYou are so funny. I can hear your voice singing the “We Song.” I have been fortunate enough to have done several projects with you to know that the project is always better with you involved! I have never known a day of projects without you being a “We” to me! Wow, that sounds like a hit country song title. Luckily this is date stamped and thus copyrighted. I will change the word projects to ‘Life’ for purposes of country and western. Say that with a drawl please.
There is a moment of ‘buy-in’ that sometimes requires an ‘I’ to make a point. It is a shock effect maybe, like when Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “I have a dream…”. That is a rare and unique case that had so much impact. I sometimes even leave myself out of the equation and just say, “You…” in my sentences. It is very powerful also.